Struggles and Faith...

"Do you now believe?"

Do you sometimes have trouble trusting God?  Do you wrestle with fear, anxiety, or worry?  Does a vague sense of dread or feelings of hopelessness sometimes oppress you?  Do you secretly wonder what's wrong with you - and whether you are truly saved, after all?  Please hang on.  Doubting and questioning are often a part of the journey of faith, and we don't have to be afraid of our questions, concerns, and difficulties... Being full of "certainty" is not the same as being full of faith, after all, since many sincere people are sincerely deceived, and on the other hand many believers experience fear, loneliness, and trouble as a result of their faith.  There is so much we simply do not know, and it is dishonest to pretend otherwise.  God knows your heart and its struggles; he knows all your secret fears.  Thankfully, there is a special prayer included in the holy Scriptures for those times when we feel especially unsteady or insecure: "Lord, I believe, help thou my unbelief..." (Mark 9:24). Here we may bring our (lack of) faith to God for healing....

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Mark 9:24

אֲנִי מַאֲמִין
עֲזֹר נָא לִי בְּחֶסְרוֹן אֱמוּנָתִי

“I believe! Please help me in my lack of faith.”

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We should not be scandalized that we sometimes struggle with our faith.  After all, Yeshua constantly questioned his disciples: “Do you now believe?” (John 16:31).  And that’s why we are commanded to "put off" the old nature and to "put on" the new nature -- because God knows we are fickle admixtures, contradictions, carnal-yet-spiritual, inwardly divided souls that need to learn to trust in the miracle of God with all our hearts....

Of course it's easy to believe when things are going well, when faith “makes sense” or provides you with a sense of community, etc., but when things are difficult, when there are disappointments, pain, grief, losses, etc., then you need to trust in the unseen good, the "hidden hand" of God's love, despite the trouble of your present circumstances.  This is part of faith’s journey: leaning on God's care, despite the “valley of the shadow of death,” despite the tests...  The way may sometimes be difficult, but "the tested genuineness of your faith -- more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire -- will be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Yeshua the Messiah" (1 Pet. 1:7).

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Psalm 119:19

גֵּר אָנֹכִי בָאָרֶץ
אַל־תַּסְתֵּר מִמֶּנִּי מִצְוֹתֶיךָ

“I am a stranger in the earth;
do not hide your commandments from me.”

Psalm 119:19 Hebrew page (pdf)